It's just not the same

My wife and I have lived in Arizona for about a month now, and we love it here. Before we moved, people warned us "It's a part of the Bible Belt" and "Expect a lot of racism" Our experience so far has been quite the opposite. The people seem friendly, and as a bi-racial couple, we don't seem to get treated different than anyone else. But unless you've been living under a rock for the past month, I'm sure you've heard about legislation that was proposed here to allow businesses to turn away homosexual couples based on their religious beliefs. After contemplation, and immense pressure from the public, Governor Jan Brewer vetoed the law, so as of now it is dead.

I want to start by saying that I think discrimination for any reason is wrong, and I think everyone should be treated equally, regardless of their racial background, religious beliefs (or lack thereof) or who the choose to marry or go to bed with at night. But when I read the news coverage and the opinion pieces on this law, I always hear it compared to the Jim Crow era and the civil rights movement. And to be frank, that pisses me off.

Blacks were brought here from Africa and sold as property. After the Civil War when they were 'emancipated' certain states systematically enacted laws to reduce them to second class citizens. Things we take for granted today like bathrooms and drinking fountains were reserved for whites. No niggers allowed. Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation on January 1, 1863. Basically signing a piece of paper stating the the United States officially saw blacks as people instead of property. And with that was supposed to come the constitutional rights of 'Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness'. Instead blacks were marginalized, disrespected and abused. Simply for the color of their skin. And here's something they don't teach in history class. On average between the when the civil war ended in 1865 and 1932 there was a black man, woman, or child lynched once a week, every week. Now fast forward to 1954, when a group of students has to appeal to the Supreme Court to go to school, because the "Separate but equal" schools they'd been forced to attend we're overcrowded and literally falling apart. The following year. Rosa Parks was arrested in Alabama for not giving up her seat on a bus. I'm sure you know all of this already because we're fortunate enough to learn it during the insult that is 'Black History Month'.

 So here's my question. How many gay only schools are there? How many people have been lynched for being homosexual over the course of the last 60, 80, 100 years? Do you think it's anywhere near 2000? Is anyone denied the right to vote in America today because they're gay? How about 'Straight only' restaurants, bathrooms and water fountains? Are gays discriminated against in America today? Yes they are. But if you think that Blacks aren't, try being one of ten black kids walking through the hall in Fairport High School and count how many times you get called nigger. Or walk through the mall with your wife who isn't black and see how many dirty looks you get. And how many black males are arrested and incarcerated compared to any other demographic? But those things are nothing compared to what the men and women before me went through.

People died so I could marry whomever I choose. Men and women had fire hoses and dogs turned on them so I could vote. There is a difference between discrimination and persecution. There is a difference between discrimination and segregation. Homosexuality is more accepted in America today than any time in our country's history, and when people use what people like Rosa Parks went through to further their political position, that minimizes what they did, and it is offensive. And make no mistake about it, it is purely political. There is no shortage of businesses that would be happy to provide their services to a gay couple who is getting married, or adopting a child. So if you have other options, why would you want to give your money to someone who clearly is against what you are? Because if they refuse to serve you because of your sexuality, you can go on TV and talk about how hateful religious people are. I am a husband, I am a heterosexual, I am a Christian, I am black. If I knew of a business that refused to serve any demographic, I'd simply take my business elsewhere. That is, of course unless I was trying to draw attention to the fact that this business was choosing to serve certain people and not others. There's more to this than can fit in one post, so I'll save the rest for my next entry.

I Choose Love

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

That might be the most famous passage in The Bible about love. When I read it, it reminds me how I'd like to live my life. I italicize those words because, although I'd like to be that way every day of my life, I often fall short. The problem is, it's not just me. I think as a society, we have forgotten what Love is. I understand that not everyone has the same beliefs as me when it comes to the Bible, and this is not an attempt to get people "On my side" Instead it's a commentary on how I see the world we live in and how it is DEEPLY flawed.

Perhaps I'm a bit naive, but I would think that patience, kindness, humility and selflessness are things we would all strive for, regardless of our theological beliefs. And if not, the perhaps love isn't too high on your list of priorities. But if those are qualities that you would like to see in a person, ask yourself, do you see them in yourself??

Love is Patient. Americans as a whole are not patient. We want what we want now, and will do whatever it takes to get it. Think about how many times you've cursed under your breath at the person at the grocery store who is moving too slow through the center of the aisle. And I can't tell you how many times I've yelled, or cursed at someone who is going 40 MPH down the highway in the left hand lane? Is that a picture of patience? I would say not.

Love is kind. Is kindness a characteristic we exhibit in our everyday lives? Sure, we're willing to toss a buck to the guy downtown who's got his hand out. But when was the last time you made a true sacrifice? And I don't necessarily mean a financial one, although those are certainly commendable. But I mean when was the last time you rolled up your sleeves, and decided to get in the trenches and help someone who needed it? If it's been a while, you're not alone. I'm not that great at it either.

Does not envy, does not boast, is not proud. I lump these three together, because in my mind, they can easily be summed up in one word. Humility. When I look at our country and the people we elevate to "Star" status, I get the impression that humility is not a trait the we consider important. Musicians sing songs in which brag about how many cars they have, how many people they've slept with, how much cash is in their accounts. Is that humility? And what about pro sports? Athletes repeatedly talk about how great they are, and how they're the best to play whatever game they happen to be good at. Not only that, but when there is an athlete who tries to be humble (Read: Tim Tebow) he's berated in the media, and people don't know what to do with him. Humility is not a trait that we as Americans seem to value, and I think that's a problem.

I titled this post I Choose Love, because I have decided that I want to demonstrate these things in my life more. I know that when I've done it in the past, it's made my life a little more rosy, and if it brightens the lives of those around me, then It's certainly worth it. Imagine, if we as a society decided to be a patient, kind, humble people. I think the change would be so dramatic, that you wouldn't recognize the world we live in. But it can't happen if someone doesn't put their foot down and say, I choose love. That means if I come across someone who doesn't agree with my political ideology, or who is of a different faith than me, I will respect that persons choices, and love them. That means when someone does me harm in one way or another, I will do my best to forgive and move on, difficult as it may be. Why? Because I choose love. And perhaps if I do, and show these loving qualities, then I can make my teeny tiny corner of the world a sunnier place to live in.

Finally!

A place where I can spew my dorky food trivia!! All week, I've been thinking about songs with food in the title. Why?? Well, I don't know why. But I did start making a list, here's what I got so far, as well as links to videos of the song (if available)

Smoothie Song - Nickel Creek
Possibly the best Non-Jazz instrumental of modern times

Chili Dog - James Taylor
This guy is amazing! And according to a friend of mine, this song is crude.. Go figure

Mother Popcorn - James Brown
Still don't know what he's talking about, because his lyrics are in some alien language. I figure it has something to do with popcorn, or else it wouldn't be in the title

Spill The Wine - War
Obviously the guy who wrote this one never had to clean up red wine.. What a pain!! Which brings us to..

Red Red Wine - UB40
This song was originally performed by Neil Diamond, but the less said about that the better.


Popsicle Toes - Michael Franks
Talk about double entendre, sheesh!


And since we've got that out of the way, here's the ROTP (Recipe of the post)

Candied Bacon

1/2 lb bacon slices (10 slices)
1/2 cup Demerara sugar

Cook bacon in 2 batches in a 12-inch heavy skillet over moderate heat, turning over once, until bacon is lightly browned on edges but still flexible, 5 to 6 minutes total per batch. Transfer bacon as cooked to paper towels to drain.

Pour off fat from skillet and arrange bacon in skillet in 1 layer. Sprinkle Demerara sugar over bacon and cook over low heat, turning occasionally with tongs, until sugar is dissolved, caramelized (sugar melts very slowly and burns easily; reduce heat if necessary after sugar begins to caramelize), and coats bacon, 8 to 10 minutes. (Bacon will be dark and look lacquered.) Transfer bacon with tongs to brown paper to cool.